Deep Cries Out

Psalm 42:7, “Deep calleth unto deep, at the noise of thy water spouts: all thy waves, and they billows are gone over me.”

Psalm 69:2, “I sink in deep mire, where there is no standing. I am come into DEEP waters, where the floods overflow me.”

Deep cries out to deep. Afflictions call out to further afflictions. Under our deepest sorrows lie even deeper sorrows. The Psalmist states that his troubles follow one after another, the latter harder than the first. His soul, downcast and in turmoil. His troubles seem to overtake him. 

Infertility is a painful journey and month after month it seems that deep calls out to deep. Sorrow calls out to deeper sorrow. It becomes a difficult routine. Cycle day 1: Call the doctor. Cycle day 3: Internal Ultrasound. Cycle days 3-7: Take daily medicine. Cycle day 6: Give yourself a shot to stimulate your ovaries. Cycle day 10: Another internal ultrasound. Cycle day 11: Give yourself another shot to stimulate ovulation. Cycle day 12: IUI procedure. It feels like you’re at the doctor’s office every day. The hormones make you crazy, from crying to irritability to depression. The roller coaster ride is on again and you wonder when you will be able to get off, unlock the seatbelt, release the harness, and step off the ride. You await the results anxiously for the 2 weeks before you are able to take the pregnancy test. You pray. You read the Word. You seek God’s face. You cry. You try not to think about. And then the day comes. The day to test. You dread it and look forward to it at the same time. The three minutes awaiting the results seem like an eternity. And once again, you read the results, NOT PREGNANT. You’ve seen it a million times, or at least it seems like it. You cry. You ask God why.  You wipe your tears. You move on. You get ready for the day. You go to work or church or the grocery store. And you start the cycle all over again. 

Deep cries out to deep. But alas, the deepest sorrow and the deepest trouble calls out to an even greater depth. Underneath the depths, even at the bottom of all depths. This depth is God’s mercy. John Bunyan says, 

“Although the deeps, or depths of calamity into which the godly may fall, may be as deep as Hell, and methinks they should be no deeper: yet this is the comfort, and for the comfort of them, of the godly that are thus a sinking: The mercy of God for them lies deeper…God’s arms are long and strong, and can reach to the bottom, and also beyond, of all misery and distress, that Christians are subject to in this life. Indeed, mercy seems to be asleep, when we are sinking, for then we are as if all things were careless of us, but it is but a lion couchant, it will awake in time for our help…as a lion in his den, so will God, at the fittest season, arise for the help and deliverance of a sinking people.”

Deep cries out to deep. But God’s mercy is even deeper. His arm reaches to the farthest depth, to meet us in our time of need. 

(Excerpts from John Bunyan’s book All Loves Excelling)

~ Paige